Friday, September 24, 2010

Movie Review: the Town

starring: Ben Affleck, Jon Hamm, Rebecca Hall, Jeremy Renner, Blake Lively.

The Town

Monday, September 20, 2010

Movie Review: Easy A

Here's my review for Easy A. I'm going to be creating original formats for my reviews, so that they have a magazine-like quality with better visuals. Now I can run wild with creativity on this thing, enjoy!

Note: there are options to zoom in and out, bring up a full screen and scroll up and down.

Easy A

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

2010 MTV Video Music Awards Fashion Report Card



So the MTV Video Music Awards came and went without much to talk about this year... probably because Chelsea Handler made one of the worst hosts I've ever seen. That sucks, b/c now this normally pretty funny comedienne won't have much of a chance to win over more of an audience for her E network nightly TV show. In case you missed it, she made jokes about the band Sugar Ray. Sugar. Fucking. Ray. Sorry lady, but Justin Bieber's fan can't think all the way back to nineties. It was sadly uncomfortable and embarrassing to watch her train wreck play out on stage.

Anyways, at least we have fashion. And meat dresses. And Taylor Swift who tried to sing a song about Kanye West while barefoot, but instead managed to look really stupid and desperate for the first time in her career. At least she isnt't singing about Joe Jonas anymore?

Grading Scale: The more grand and outlandish your outfit is, the better grade it will earn you. Especially if you can pull it off effortlessly. I better not see any boring Emmy-like costumes around here...

Lady Gaga




Grade: A+++
Designer: Alexander McQueen

This is the best thing Lady Gaga has ever worn. I can honestly say i'm jealous. Makes me sad we no longer have McQueen to design anything this breathtaking again. The greens skirt underneath is a great pop of color. So pretty I could shed a tear.

Lady Gaga - dress two



Grade: A+
Designer: Alexander McQueen

She truly looks lovely in this one. It's nice to see what she looks like when she really dresses to the nines and goes for pretty instead of shock value.

Lady Gaga - meat dress



Grade: C-
Designer: Franco Fernandez

When asked why she decided to wear meat, Gaga replied "So people don't treat me like i'm a piece of meat."
Wow, really fucking insightful. She should just shut up.

Shockingly however, it doesn't look terrible. I hate the shoes the most though.

Katy Perry = winner



Grade: A+
Designer: Marchesa

Katy Perry gets it. She is one of the few who truly chose to wear something fun for an MTV thing. I like her ice-skater inspired dress, and even her nails (with images of Russel Brand printed on them - you would think that could look terrible, but it was cool).

Jane Lynch



Grade: C-
Designer: ?

She only gets a passing grade because I like her. She may have taken her glee character a bit too far. Track suit trench coat? At least I can say I never thought I would see one of those. What she's wearing underneath looks really nice though.

Cory Monteith from Glee



Grade: A
Designer: don't know

Gets cute points.

Jared Leto (center)



Grade for Coat: C
Designer: Burberry

Rest of outfit: D
Grade for Hair: F

I wish I wasn't so distracted by his fucking hair. He's also wearing too many layers. He looks like he came out of the lost boys or something. Some people just shouldn't be allowed to get too creative.

Leto, before:

Sofia Vergara



Grade: B+
Designer: Dolce & Gabbana

She probably just enchanted me with her hot Colombian accent. Although I kind of feel she could have used this opportunity to show off her awesome boobs and failed.

Ciara



Grade: A
Designer: Givenchy

Beautiful.

Pharrell



Grade: A+
Designer: I wish I knew

He remains one of the most fashionable men of our time. He can literally wear anything.

Rosario Dawson



Grade: D
Designer: don't know

Out of all the clothes that exist in the world, this is the thing she comes up with to wear to the VMA's? It probably didn't even look good as a concept. The shoes don't work either.

Drake



Grade: A
Designer: Tom Ford

I loved everything, but i'm not so sure about the shoes. I slept on it, and I decided I don't hate them... they were brave at least.

Florence Welch from Florence + the Machine



Grade: A+
Designer: Givenchy

I don't know how or why MTV decided to single out her band for a bunch of stupid MTV awards, but good for her. They deserve the recognition. I love the zipper front and mermaid bottom on that dress.

Evan Rachel Wood



Grade: F
Designer: Gucci

Oh. My. Gawd. This is ugly. She looks like the bad side of the 90s. What a skinny waste.

The cast of The Social Network



Justin Timberlake: Grade A
Jesse Eisenberg: Grade C
Andrew Garfield: Grade A+

Designer: mostly Dolce & Gabbana

Justin Timberlake always looks good. Jesse Eisenberg needs to not straighten his hair, it makes it look greasy. Andrew Garfield earned his grade just for being the hottest out of that group, and because his career is totally blowing up right now.

Emma Stone



Grade: B
Designer: not sure

Even though her dress is boring, she gets points for being super cute.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Ke$ha



Grade: D+
Designer: herself

She gets the plus because I initially thought she couldn't do anything. But as it turns out, she can put armholes through a trash bag. God, take a fucking shower.

Usher and the Biebs



Usher:

Grade: B+
Designer: I thinnnnk Armani

Biebs:
Grade: D
Designer: probs Ellen Degeneres

Usher looks slick, while Bieber looks like a lesbian.

Justin Bieber 2



Grade: B+
Designer: not sure

Better off to stay looking like you are in high school.

Ashley Greene



Grade: C+
Designer: Giambattista Valli

Really, this dress is gorgeous. Except she's worn it maybe 20 fucking times already. Also, this is the VMA's, so points lost for lack of creativity. She scoots by with a passing grade due only to her high-wattage hotness.

Selena Gomez




Grade: B+

Designer: Reem Acra

Maybe a little too much sophisticated glamour for a vma? But i'll take it. She looks too cute. Daring color.